03.02.04
I am so frustrated with my life right now that I want to give up and move back to Arizona. Seriously. I can't handle this anymore, and I feel like I have no support here. I need MY family. People who are looking out for MY best interest over anyone else's. I just can't do this anymore.
I really shouldn't be that surprised that my life is so fucked up. I bring this shit on myself thinking that I can help people while making my life easier at the same time. Stupid, stupid. And I shouldn't be surprised that my finances will never be right. I don't deserve to be worry free for ONE DAMN DAY. It just gets worse and worse.
So, today we take a look at the bank account and it is $2000 overdrawn. Some stupid company that we have been telling for months that we are still fighting with the Army about our pay took the ENTIRE amount we owe them out of our account. Not just the payments due, THE WHOLE DAMN THING. We SPECIFICALLY told them THREE TIMES that we couldn't pay the whole thing, we have no idea why they would think we could pay the whole thing, and NOT TO TAKE IT OUT. They did it anyway. Isn't that illegal or something?
Then to top it off, Gretta is going to take our car to work tomorrow and just not come home. Nice huh? I can't tell her no because then I look like the bitch. She has a meeting, mandatory or soemthing, and wants to stay in Logan since it's so late. Leaving us with her kids, and also ruining our plans for tomorrow night that she knew about already. Now, I don't expect her to blow off her meeting, and I know she has no control over the fact that it is ruining our plans, but isn't it just MY luck. I get stuck here another night with someone else's kids, while she gets to use my car to stay the night at her friends house and probably get drunk and go out. Sure it may not be reasonable to drive all the way home after a 9PM meeting and then go back in the morning, but I just feel like it isn't fair that she gets to use my car to go out leaving me here yet again. I am frustrated and I feel completely used. I feel like I am living my life to make HER life easier. I came here to be helpful to her and though I would be babysitting while she was at work, not while she was at work and while she stayed the night away from home, went out and partied, and hung out with her friends leaving me to have no life.
I can't even talk about this anymore. I am getting so frustrated I am about to cry. I need to talk to Gretta but I don't know how to. Anything I say to her would hurt her feelings, and the fact that I felt so overwhelmed and used would be forgotten because all of a sudden we would have new problems. It would make things worse. Instead of me suffering, it will be me suffering and her mad at me and our relationship ruined. Why not just leave it me suffering? Me telling her won't make it better, or even make her care, It will make her mad. Ah, fuck it.
Before
&
After |
|
quote
 navigate
did you miss?
links
|
