04.17.02
It's snowing!!!! It snowed a couple of days ago, stuck all night, and then melted yesterday afternoon. Then it snowed again this morning and melted by the time I got up today. Now it is snowing again!! Talk about strange weather. We went from 71� one day to snow the next!!!I had the weirdest dream again last night. This time I had a dream that Jeremy Davies, the guy that plays Corporal Upham on Saving Private Ryan, IMed me on AOL. His screen name was 4060e, which is an impossible name to have on AOL. All he said was something like, I know I haven't gotten to talk to you much, I don't even know your name or where you live, but I will be back and I hope we can talk later. I didn't talk back, and that was all he said and then Angela came in and woke me up. How weird am I? I had a weird little obsession with Jeremy Davies because he reminded me of Adam (no, not the part he played in the movie being a total coward, his mannerisms and how he is built and his face a little), and since Adam has been gone, at least I could look at Jeremy Davies and think of Adam. But, I hadn't even thought about the guy in like a week, since I showed Adam a picture of him online. I liked his haircut in a picture I saw and thought i would look good on Adam so I showed him that picture. Heh. So, it is kinda weird that I would dream about him, especially in a freakin AOL IM way!!! The things your subconscious will come up with, I swear! So anyway, I talked to one of the managers in the Den last night about why I left. The conversation somehow turned to Arian, the girl I am having problems with. Why am I not surprised? I didn't want it to become a public Den issue at all. The manager seems determined to get me back in the community, and swears that she can talk to the other girl and staighten stuff out. I just don't want to bring it all up again if it was finally laid to rest. I have a feeling that some accusations of Adam cheating on me behind my back, or leading that other girl on for longer than he will admit to, or something of that nature, are bound to come out. I know that it took him a while to tell that girl about me, and to break off his romantic ties with her. He told me all about it and was very straightforward with the fact that he was avoiding it (he was basically trying to act like nothing happened at all, as if that will make it all go away), and I know what a pushover he is and how much he didn't want to hurt the other girl. Not the best way to handle things, but it's a little late to change it now. I just don't want this turning into a he said/she said thing where everyone tries to prove that Adam is the jerk and they are right. If we can't be in the same community together and act human, so be it. Whatever. It's just an online community for goodness sake. I am done....
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