Before I forget, I have to mention dinner last night. We went to the Golden Corral, a buffet place in Logan. When we finally get seated (the place was packed and we had 8 people in our party), Marshall's dad, Les, insists that we pray before we get up to eat. Now, I am all for family prayer, and even praying before meals and all, but in the middle of a restaurant so crowded that we could barely hear ourselves think? I'm sorry, but even in Mormon country, people don't pray outloud in the middle of a restaurant. During the prayer, as disrespectful as it might have been, I looked around at the table and everyone with their arms folded and eyes closed, glanced around the restaurant to see the people at all of the surounding tables snickering at us, and I let out a few uncontrollable giggles. I am relieved that no one at the table heard me (not that they would be able to over Les praying so loud that the 10 tables around us could understand every word). I wouldn't want Gretta to have to hear about the disrespectful friend (that laughs during prayers) that she let move into the house and live with their grandchildren every time she talked to her in-laws. She would never forgive me, because that is exactly what would happen. Dinner after the prayer went fine, that is until we got up to leave. We are leaving the table and Les goes to leave the tip. The total tab of all of us eating was at least $70. 15% is the standard tip. To tip 10% would be acceptable, although it is stingy. Les tipped $5 on an over $70 ticket. That is a less than 7% tip. And, to top it off, he left a religious pamphlet on the table on top of the tip! First of all, that is just freaky. Kinda like when you were a kid and went trick or treating, and instead of getting candy from the weird neighbors down the street, you get a picture of Jesus or a mini-bible telling you that if you aren't saved and accept Jesus as your lord and savior, you are going to HELL. When you are a kid, and you are all dressed up as a vampire or the devil, knocking on people's doors begging for free candy, hell is the last thing on your mind. Second of all, this is Mormon country. You just don't hand out a pamphlet from a Unitarian church, or whatever church they belong to, in the middle of a Mormon town. (It isn't like they put a Book of Mormon on every table, include scriptural quotes on every receipt, or play hymns over the loudspeakers in the restaurant.) Especially when you only tipped 7%. You are not only a religious freak, since you can't go out to dinner without telling the Mormons they are evil, you are a cheap religious freak. Gretta managed to sneak some more money onto the table to at least make the tip decent, but she couldn't get away with removing the pamphlet without being caught. I could just imagine the stink they would have raised if they sa her stealing the pamphlet off of the table!!! I guess I should have been glad that they didn't pull the same stunt they did at Gretta's wedding. At the reception, they re-blessed their food after it had already been blessed once, because it was a bishop that blessed it, and apparently he isn't good enough to say prayer for their food. Then they had the gall to take Gretta and Marshall into a seperate room and bless their marriage. Like if they didn't bless it it would fail for sure. Les had been asked to perform the wedding in the first place. He refused. Then he insists that their marriage has to be blessed by him? Lordy be! I would have been irate. Maybe that is why Gretta gets the lunatic in-laws. I could never in a million years deal with them doing that kind of stuff to me. Doesn't the bible say that the Lord won't give you more than you can handle? Heh. He knows better than to stick me with crazy bible thumping in-laws.

Now, as if the things I just wrote about weren't enough, another incident happened after I thought I was done with this entry. Tonight, at dinner, I was appalled. I thought Gretta was about to start screaming and storm out of the room, and drag out the in-laws with her by their perspective grey heads and throw them outside in the snow. We are sitting down to a nice dinner, and Billy was being a typical 5 year old. He was excited about the rest of the family coming over later on for Marshall's birthday, and so he was fidgety. He was playing with his food and not exactly practicing his table manners. Gretta and Marshall had to repeadedly tell him to use his silverware and not play with his food, things like that. They were both being really patient with him. All of a sudden, out of the blue, Les starts to talk to Billy in this stern voice. Billy could tell by the tone in his voice that he was going to say something unapproving, so like a typical 5 year old, he stuck his fingers in his ears. That seemed to really irk Les, and he told Billy, "Take your fingers out of your ears and listen to me boy." Now, this is from the grandfather that is never around, and technically isn't even the grandfather to Billy at all. When I heard him say that I just put my head down and avoided eye contact with anyone but Billy. Billy got a worried look on his face and Les told him that he wasn't going to lay into him, but that if "your daddy had done that at your age he knows what would have happened." Gretta started to get pretty upset by then, I could tell just by the mood at the table and how she responded to that comment. She asked Les, "And what is that?" Les proceeded to tell us that Marshall would have been told no a few times, then smacked on the hand, and then whipped with a belt. Then he told us that Marshall never misbehaved again and when he heard no he knew what it meant. How dare he imply that Gretta and Marshall aren't doing a good job of raising their children, or doing anything wrong when it comes to raising their children, and that his way would somehow be better. Beating your children to convince them to behave is how impatient people with no parenting skills, or even basic respect for other people, raise their children. And to insult Marshall and Gretta in that way at the dinner table in front of their children and a perfect stranger (that being me since they never met me before 2 days ago), is so rude that I am still in awe that when Les opened his mouth that is what actually came out of it. That wasn't the only rude thing that was even said at dinner. Right after they finished eating, Les announces, "Looks like we will need 2 Tums again." What in the hell is that suppoed to mean? Marshall was pretty surprised by the comment even (and he has been pretty oblivious to everything so far), and he asked his dad what he meant. Les covered his ass by saying, "Oh so that we can have room for dessert." How Tums helps make room in your already fat and sassy belly for dessert is beyond me. Must be a white trash trick, because Les and Rose are King and Queen of the trailer park. Well, at least they would be if they could afford a trailer.