01.01.02
Here it is, another new year, and here I am, still alone. I have managed to annoy every person I know somehow it seems this week, but I won't get too much into that because they read this. The last week has been very scummy bummy for me. I have been having mood swings and trying my best to control them and not go off on anyone or show that I don't feel good, but it gets harder and harder. I think it is starting to manifest itself in other ways. The past two days I have had excruciating mouth pain and I am getting so tired of hurting. I want to cry most of the time, but I don't want to cry in front of anyone. I don't know if it is that I miss my grandparents, or if I am not used to being away from home on the holidays, or if I am just scared about new things going on in my life, or if it is something else like my usual "I hate myself" depression. Maybe it is all of the above. The last thing I want is to look like a whiney brat that can't control her own emotions. I know what I am feeling, I am just sick and tired of feeling it. Today when Gretta and I were on our way back from Logan with the kids we came across this weird fog. It was sitting about 2 feet off of the ground and only went up to about 8 feet in the air, and it went from thick to hazy with no warning. It was like literally driving through clouds. That fog is exactly how I feel most of the time. It is like I can see the good things above me that are waiting to happen, and the good things that are at my feet that sustain me, but right in front of me and happening at that moment is so unsure and foggy. Does that make sense????One thing did happen today that had me laughing so hard I couldn't even talk. I was sitting at the computer just chatting away with some friends when I turned around and spotted something moving on the chair behind me. It was Ruby, the 17 month old baby, sitting at the kitchen table literally COVERED from head to toe in birthday cake from her older sister Angela's birthday (Happy Birthday Angela!!!!). It wasn't normal messy baby, though. She was so plastered in cake that when she started to try and pull herself up, her little hands kept sliding down the back of the chair. Well, instead of hands, she had balls of cake and frosting. She saw me looking at her and started fussing because she couldn't get up and she couldn't get her fingers to peel apart. I had to make her sit there and whine for a minute so I could go get the camera and take a few pictures of her, but when I finally went to pick her up I almost dropped her because she was so slippery. I carried her into Gretta by her armpits and held her out in front of me so that I didn't get smeared. By the time I got into the room that Gretta was in, I was laughing so hard I couldn't talk so I just held Ruby up and bent over laughing hysterically trying my hardest not to drop her. I could barely breathe by then, so I had to take her into the bathroom and set her in the tub. While I was bathing her, I had to pry the cake out of her hair. It took three shampooings to get the cake helmet off of her head. You couldn't even see her hair under the mass of cake and frosting she had rubbed up there. It took me a good 10 minutes of constant scrubbing to finally get the girl clean. I have never laughed so hard in my entire life.....
Before
&
After |
|
quote
 navigate
did you miss?
links
|
