10-10-01
Have you ever gone to a party and been the ugliest one there? Or maybe been the one that everyone looks at as the fat girl at the party? Well, if that has never happened to you then let me tell you....IT SUCKS! I am not ugly or especially fat, but this weekend I felt like I was. Feeling unattractive is the worst feeling in the world. No matter how much you know that the opinions of anyone else shouldn't matter, especially people you will never see again, it doesn't lessen how being looked down on makes you feel. I catch myself sometimes looking at people and being SO GLAD that I was born me, and not them. At that party this weekend I felt like people were looking at me and thinking the same thing to themselves. My new mission in life is to starve myself until I am satisfactorily thin, and then when I see all of the people that look down on me now I will make sure to reject them and make them feel as bad as they have made me feel. Then I will find some normal, plain guy out there who feels the same way about himself as I currently do about me, and make him the luckiest guy in the world. As long as I dont kill myself in the process with the unhealthy way I plan to pull this off, I think my plan is killer (no pun intended). I know that everyone I know that reads this is going to want to slap me around for being so superficial and letting other people's opinions affect me so much. Hopefully it is just a phase or a weak moment. We all have them.......
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