04.09.03
My friend that announced she is pregnant might not be pregnant at all. She started cramping and bleeding two days after she took the test. It was only an at home test, so it could have been a false positive and she could have started her period, or she could be having a miscarriage. Either way now I feel bad for her for wishing it was me and not her. Adam called today because of an email I sent him telling him how awful I have been feeling. He was really worried. Of course, instead of sucking it up and telling him that I will be okay, I cried like a baby to him on the phone for an hour. I don't think he knew quite what to say, and I could tell he was worried about saying something else to make me cry. I don't blame him. I was a mess. At least he called and listened. I have been crying pretty solidly all day today. I decided to paint a bird house that I bought at Michael's and never finished, and I even sat there and cried while I painted. I'm like one of those pathetic people you see in the commercials for anti-depressants that sits curled up in a ball in the shower crying while the water runs all over them. Adam did tell me one really cool thing though. He got to ride in a Black Hawk helicopter yesterday. He took a camera with him and took pictures of everything he could think of. They basically just had it out there so that the guys who don't get to do jobs like Airborne or Special Forces, like my lowly spook husband, could experience it. So the pilot flew like he would fly in battle if he was trying not to get shot. Adam said that he felt free fall three different times and took a picture of one of them. He had a great time. At least that made me smile.
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